self assessment

List poem

I tried to put my poetry mostly based on ideas about my opinion toward poetry. In this poem, message is clear, focuses, and concise that shows writer’s eagerness and complaints toward the poetry with numerous reasons which just look silly. It’s also easy to summarize because words are really short and simple with basic reasons to hate poetry. But main idea/thesis/story/line is also easy to identify, because there is only one topic and the sentences are connected ‘because…it’s……’ and there are all kinds of list to show writer’s thoughts and emotions. I also tried to make a rhyme from the beginning of the sentences with ‘b and b’ ‘d and d’ ‘h and h’ with similar pronunciations when the sentences start. I made a twist at the ending happily as a twist and this ending is satisfying.
There is few errors are noticeable when ‘It was’ sentence is trying to connect so many other sentences including nouns, adjectives, and gerund. Conventions are well bringing out meaning and voice, showing writer’s emotions of anger and eagerness.
Pattern is well fitted into the topic and main purpose of writer. Other pieces are well understood as a reader and they’re easy to make connection between those ideas and main topic as making connections between readers’ lives and the poem; readers use flashback to connect their own experiences and the poems. With putting big emotion from the beginning, I put different big emotion at the end part with same sentences so that they’re really effective to the ending to make readers satisfy with a twist to say ‘but now I love poetry’
In this poem, I put a lot of effort to show my (writer’s) emotions of sadness that he keeps complaining. In other sentences, readers would feel writer’s topic creates a confident voice that cans five great expressions to readers that they can understand writer and say ‘yea, I agree with that.’ my voice is making the poem more effective and descriptive to express more to the readers to understand better and feel the same as writer does.
For this list poem, I think I used good word choices because list poem must have lists and there are good rhymes in this poem. The reasons why and the lists are really simple and good to understand that readers can be confident while they’re reading.




cinquin

For ideas, I think I made a good idea in this poem because I made a twist. Poem is really short, but there’s tension while readers read it. Then I gave a last sentence “it’s me” that gives so many ideas for readers to think. I put the title “My Shadow,” but it does not only mean shadow. My idea is trying to show the reflection that we usually see ourselves and how we react to that. So in my opinion, message is clear and focused, and readers can understand it easily with some depth thought to think readers themselves. The direction is absolutely clear toward the twist and result is satisfying.
Because it’s a really short poem, it’s hard to find pickiest errors. With less errors, I cautiously say there is no problem in conventions that I could make a good convention to connect and support the main idea. But to be more specific to find the pickiest errors, the words don’t really seem to make exact syllables. Like the word ‘realize’ I used it as 3 syllables, but may be it can be 2 syllables.
Organization pattern is seems to be supporting the main idea which is the last sentence of the twist. The organization pattern has the tensions for how the story end, and their details and moods are well organized to support the main idea with a great tension. Transitions and sentences are smooth even though there are few sentences to make readers more attracted to the ending. And the ending is satisfying and effective because there is a big twist and it can make readers more desirable to read one more time.
This poem’s voice is trying to make readers have tensions while they’re reading up the next sentence. The voice showed what I wanted to tell as I put connections between descriptions and main idea through showing details but readers don’t really know what’s going to happen. And voice is carefully selected to fit the purpose and audience because readers will be satisfied to see the ending in many ways they expected to be.
In cinquin, we must use the correct syllables, because there are patterns. To be honesty, I cannot really say word choices are good because there might be other good words instead of simple and easy words. There were not many choices to make correct syllables, so I might have not that good word choices. But I would say these simple and easy words are still well supporting the main idea with voice.



Narrative poem

My main idea is about friendship and process of how they become different as the time passes by. To make a message is clear, I used a readers can see the difference and understand what writer is trying to say, what and how friendship is. I could say ideas support and expand the main idea with numerous details because from the beginning to the end, there are processes and differences between writer and his friend. With many descriptions and details, readers would see what little things can make a huge difference at the ending. By this, I think direction is also clear that poem is giving the right words of ideas of process. Writer’s direction parallelism that shows the difference and readers will keep reading to the end and realize what writer wanted to say.
For conventions, there might be few errors for grammar. In especially for punctuation marks, there is some missing grammar. The part of riding a bike faster than a friend, the sentence ‘I was the one who…’ doesn’t look that correct because I used too many ‘one’ in short sentences that don’t seem to make sense. Also there are sentences that start with capitalized ‘And’, it might be a grammar mistake also. In my opinion, pattern is really good that shows the pattern of process of how the past and now changes which is parallelism as I said before. Sentences start with “I, as a young boy, and I, as a young boy” and there is always “something I enjoy.” And also “who rode or walk faster and slower” Those keep the pattern of this poem with good organization so that readers can reread it and connect the differences with the main idea how the writer expresses the friendship. Because of this pattern and organization, readers can easily understand what writer’s trying to say.
In voice, I wrote numerous descriptions to show what I think and feel through this process of being together with friend (walking and riding a bike). Writer’s piece of passion is well showing to fit into the voice of this poem. Because there is voice that shows a little difference and process by each sentences and readers keep reading to the end to see how it ends. Also ending is my favorite, that ending is satisfying and very effective that can make readers to read it one more time and think about this poem, because I made a twist and biggest difference that my friend turns back and waits for me.
Because it’s a narrative poem, I chose the words that have same feelings and sounds that can connect the situation. I put a lot of effort to make good word choices so that writing can be clear and well suited to the topic like words of excitements with exclamations and words of silence and sadness with period.